Monday, November 30, 2009

So The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb

Here is how it happened...
I met my boyfriend Jacob over 6 months ago. He lived in the apartment above me. I had seen him a few times, thought he was cute but didn't really say anything. One day I asked who his room mate was and told her she should  introduce us. So A few days go by and it is his birthday. So I sort of invited myself over. That's how the whirlwind romance began.

After that we spent almost every day together. He went to art show's for my son and played with my son at the Fun Factory and took me out to dinner. . Soon after that we moved in together into a new apt.
It moved fast but it was so worth it.

He is my other half. What makes me whole.
Yes we fight, we argue and bicker. But we also laugh and Love.
He brings me flowers home. He let's me stay at home with my son. He works hard for me and for my family.
It is so nice when you can find the one that is meant for you.
I spent so long trying to make things work with the wrong guy and finally found the right guy to make it work with. And it is such a nice feeling.

I think of how lonely I was a year ago and how I thought I would never find someone to love me and my son and now I realize how wrong I was, and for the first time I love being wrong. I realized finally it was possible... it is possible to find love at even the darkest times.

I love the fact that he could prove me wrong. He proved to me that not all men are the same.
Love is such a nice feeling.
To love and be loved.

And yes I know I changed it up a little bit... Don't worry I will get back to work again soon. Sometimes though, you have to switch it up.... and understand where the funny stories really come from. . . And this is how they begin.... 
Love, Happiness, Childbirth, Parenthood, and Family. 

The Beginning

So this started as a funny site where We come to post funny stories without the expletives... and it is still that. But at the same time, this is my life. 
I have become obsessed with the quote "So the Lion fell in love with the Lamb"... Yes I am a Twilight fan... but it seems to fit me perfectly. 
He is my Lion and I am the Lamb. I feel like one of those girls with a fairytale romance. 
But enough of that. That is just to explain that things have not changed. 

This morning my son wakes up sick. So he comes in and lays with mommy because that's what I am here for... 
Next thing I know I smell this funny smell and all of a sudden it is VERY warm... "What the BLANK!"
So he comes into my bed and decides he will pee in my bed.... you know. the kind of bed that you can't really clean pee out of. . . It is a latex bed, like a Tempurpedic but better, in my opinion. 
So of course we have to do the potty thing and get him cleaned up then worry about my bed. 
Bad thing is... It is on my Boyfriends side of the bed... Oopsie! 
So yes it was another one of those "What the BLANK moments.". 

Oh The Joy! :)

Thursday, November 26, 2009


So I am going to change it up a little today... No blanking... Or at least I will try...
I have come to realize how very Thankful I am for so many things. 

Today my boyfriend went into his store and there is this old man who sits there everyday, sleeps in his truck and just tries to survive. He never asks for anything. Never asks Jacob for anyone for money or food or beer. So my boyfriend handed him 4 dollars, it was all he had on him at the time, and said "Happy Thanksgiving" and the man started crying and said "Thank you. I am a weepy old man but you just broke my heart and made my Thanksgiving!". He was so grateful for 4 dollars... 

So I remembered every time I have ever felt sorry for myself or helpless and now I will remember this man that is thankful for 4 dollars. How much can you get with 4 dollars? A candy bar? A pack of gum? A soda? A gallon of milk? Really think about it... 
So Jacob saved food from our wonderful Turkey dinner and brought him a plateful of Thanksgiving food. And that is his Thanksgiving. 

So just when you think times are rough remember that story... Remember this story of the little old man who ate his Thanksgiving dinner in front of a gas station. What would 4 dollars give you? 

I am thankful for:
My son!
My family. 
The fact that I am able to wake up each morning healthy and alive along with my son. 
The ability to have warm water, heat for the cold, AC for the heat and a roof over our heads. 
A pantry full of food. 
A comfortable bed for myself and my son. 
Toys for my child. 
The extras of internet and cable. 
A car. 
Enough money to put presents under the tree. 
The love of my son and my boyfriend! 

What are you thankful for?

I Hope you have a Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

It's a proven study that...

Your walking through the house, it is the middle of the night and you don't ant to turn on the light for fear of waking the sleeping angel in the next room. Because of this error you JAM your toe into the toy truck in the middle of the floor... because your sensors are on you remember that little sleeping angel and quietly curse under your breath. Pain all gone. 

Now the next day your child is playing with that toy truck and as you walk around him you SLAM your shin into the coffee table. Remembering that your child is right below your feet you yell out "Oh honey bunches of oats" and limp away feeling miserable and angry at the world... 

So why did your toe feel better last night??
Because you "blanked" and "blanked" and "blanked" your heart away. 
But this time you had to keep it under wraps because of your child. 

A recent study done, By Cosmo nonetheless, stated that it helps to be able to let it all out. So the next time you kick a table or run into the glass wall, it has happened, Blank it all out. Even if you really do have to "Blank!"

Monday, November 23, 2009

J-lo falls on her BLANK!

Ok... J-Lo is supposed to be a hot 
superstar diva?...

I know we are all human 
and make mistakes...
But really... what the BLANK?!?

Ok I know it is wrong... 
but that is just so 
blankin funny!!!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

It's chocolate?!?

Every morning here starts the same. The only thing that is different is the ungodly hour that my son wakes me up at.
Wake up, trudge out of bed and head down stairs. Brush teeth, go potty and work on breakfast.

Well that morning had the little difference that it occasionally does. The smell that somehow I didn't notice... he walks into the bathroom to go potty and well next thing I know I see his hand heading to his mouth... covered with a "chocolate coating"...??

Let me back up by saying that my son is normally pretty good about telling me when he has made a stinky... He is pretty good about going to the potty on his own...

So back to where we were, the chocolaty hand... I yell, he cries, and the "chocolate" is now on his leg, the toilet seat, the wall and of course his butt.... But the good part is that it is not on his face or (eegash) in his mouth. But of course the line of expletives come out here as I am cleaning him and the bathroom, "ew, BLANK, gross, BLANK, nasty!"

The thought never occured to him that he hadn't woke up with a chocolaty surprise but a diaper full of BLANK.

Another moment of "What the BLANK!?!"

Welcome to blank off...

My idea for this came from a night where I couldn't sleep... 
I was laying in bed trying to sleep and well I have what the Dr's call "restless leg syndrome". Basically my legs tell me "blank off, you can't sleep!"

You see, I have a 3 year old... so I try to keep the expletives down to a minimum. We as parents are always able to come up with funny words to cover up the bad word... "Oh, cheese and rice!" "Oh, shishkabobs!". 
But lets be real, who wants their little boy or girl to go to school saying, "Damnation, I hurt my toe!" ??

So this is it. Anytime you have been cut off in traffic, cussed out your coffee table or said a loud word at the sign of a wall that your young child pretended to be Monet with his own... well you probably know the drill. This is where you can share your stories... Maybe someone else has had the same experience as you have and would like a good laugh. 

So let it out, go ahead and BLANK OFF!